Elder M. Russell Ballard: Fathers and Sons: A Remarkable Relationship

I really enjoyed this talk, especially since this was my first general priesthood meeting with Taylor.

Elder Ballard started his talk by saying how much he enjoyed seeing fathers and sons together at this priesthood meeting. Then he said:

It is a visual reminder of two of the most powerful elements of our theology: priesthood and family.  Everything in the restored gospel of Jesus Christ, including the ordinances of the holy temple, is focused on the possibilities of families becoming part of the eternal family of God.


We're all on a journey. Dads are a little further down the road, but none of us has yet arrived at our final destination. We are all in the process of becoming who we will one day be. [I really like that quote, "We are all in the process of becoming who we will one day be."] Fathers and sons can play a critical role in helping each other become the best that they can be.


Fathers, you are the primary model of manhood for your sons. You are their most meaningful mentor, and believe it or not, you are their hero in countless ways. Your words and your example are a great influence on them.


Tonight I want to give you young men three simple suggestions on how to take full advantage of your relationship with your dad. And then I want to give you fathers three suggestions about relating to and communication with your sons.


First, trust your father.  Your dad wants more than anything for you to be happy and successful, so why would you not want to trust someone like that?


Second, take an interest in your father's life. Ask about his job, his interests, his goals. How did he decide to do the work he does? What was he like when he was your age? How did he meet your mother? 


Third, ask your father for advice. Let's be honest: he is probably going to give you his advice whether you ask for it or not, but it just works so much better when you ask!  Ask for his advice on Church activity, on classes, on friends, on school, on dating, on sports or other hobbies. Ask for his counsel on your Church assignments, on preparing for your mission, on decisions or choices you have to make.


OK, fathers, now it's your turn.


First, fathers, listen to your sons - really listen to them. Ask the right kinds of questions, and listen to what your sons have to say each time you have a few minutes together. you need to know - not to guess but to know - what is going on in your son's life. Don't assume that you know how he feels just because you were young once. Your sons live in a very different world from the one in which you grew up.  A one-on-one relationship should be a routine part of your stewardship with your sons.


Don't think you have to try to fix everything or solve everything during these visits. Most of the time, the best thing you can do is just listen.


Second, pray with an for your sons. Give them priesthood blessings.


Third, dare to have the "big talks" with your sons. You know what I mean: talks about drugs and drinking, about the dangers of today's media - the Internet, cyber technologies, and pornography - and about priesthood worthiness, respect for girls, and moral cleanliness. While these should not be the only subjects you talk about with your sons, please don't shy away from them.  I am especially concerned that we communicate openly and clearly with our sons about sexual matters.


This was a lot of copying on my part, but this talk is a pretty good manual for fathers. I am grateful for it.