Elder Robert D. Hales: Our Duty God - The Mission of Parents and Leaders to the Rising Generation

Elder Hales talk was about the importance of parents teaching and listening to their children. This is one of many talks during this conference about the duties of parents. Elder Hales gives many excellent ideas about how we can be successful in talking to our children.

Throughout my life as a father and grandfather, I have pondered the question, what is my duty to God in relation to the youth? May I share some of what I have learned by way of personal reflection and testimony. (This is a good example of a topic sentence/paragraph; Elder Hales lets us know very early, what the talk is about.

Our duty to God as parents and leaders begins with leading by example - consistently and diligently living gospel principles at home. This takes daily determination and diligence.  For youth, there is no substitute for seeing the gospel lived in our daily lives.


We lead them by understanding their hearts and walking alongside them on the gospel path.  To truly understand their hearts, we must do more than just be in the same room or attend the same family and Church activities. We must plan and take advantage of teaching moments that make a deep and lasting impression upon their minds and hearts.


I have learned that what makes a priesthood or Scout activity most meaningful to a boy is not just getting a merit badge but having the opportunity to sit and talk with a leader who is interested in him and his life.


Research shows that during the most important transitions in life - including those periods when youth are most likely to drift away from the Church - the greatest influence [comes] from the regular, warm, friendly, caring interaction with parents.


Where family meals are concerned, it's not the food but the family interaction that nourishes the soul.
[We have always eaten dinner as a family, but for many years, we would also read at the table during mealtime. Theresia finally suggested that we make a rule that "no reading" at the table while we are there eating. I was tough at first because I usually have plenty to say at the dinner table, especially about table manners. But it wasn't a positive experience. So I have had to work on 'better' conversational skills. I do feel better about our dinner time together.]

For our interactions with you to truly touch their hearts, we have to pay attention to them.  Most important is asking them questions, letting them talk, and then being willing to listen - yes, listen and listen some more - even hearken with spiritual ears!


Being there means understanding the hearts of our youth and connecting with them. And connecting with them means not just conversing with them, but doing things with them too.


Adult members of the Church should understand that Personal Progress and Duty to God requirements are not just lengthy lists of items to check off. They are personal goals set by each young man and young woman to help them become worthy to receive temple ordinances, serve missions, enter into eternal marriage, and enjoy exaltation. But let it be understood: for young men and young women to try to accomplish these goals alone would be a great loss and tragedy!


It is our imperative duty to help youth understand and believe the gospel in a deeply personal way. We can teach them to walk in the light, but that light cannot be borrowed. They must earn it for themselves. They must obtain their own light of testimony directly from the source of spiritual light-God Himself- through prayer and study and pondering. They must understand who they are and who Heavenly Father wants them to become. 


Elder Hales then asks the question "How do we help them?" And he answers that question by outlining the things we can do to help our families.

When we have a family home evening, a family council, or a meaningful gospel conversation with our children, we have the opportunity to look into their eyes and tell them that we love them and that Heavenly Father loves them. In these sacred settings, we can also help them understand, deep in their hearts, who they are and how fortunate they are to have come to this earth and to our home and to participate in the covenants we have taken in the temple to be a family forever. In every interaction we share, we demonstrate the principles and blessings of the gospel.


Once again, there is a reference to the tough times we live in:
In these perilous times it is not enough for our youth to merely know. They must do. Wholehearted participation in ordinances, quorums and auxiliaries, inspired programs, and fortifying activities helps youth put on the whole armor of God. To truly choose the Lord's way they must know His way. And to truly know His way, we must teach and lead them to act, to participate, to do.


The greatest missionary work we will ever do will be in our homes. Our homes, quorums, and classes are part of the mission field. Our children and grandchildren are our most important investigators.


The greatest family history work that we will do will be within our own homes. It is the spiritual preparation of our children in the rising generation that will, through their obedience, ensure the eternal preservation and perpetuation of our families for the coming generations.


The greatest rescue, the greatest activation will be in our homes. There is no failure except in giving up. It is never too early or too late to begin. Do not worry about what has happened in the past.


The greatest faith we have will be within our homes as we remain strong in the trials and tribulations of parenthood.  The prophet Joseph Smith said, "Therefore, . . . let us cheerfully do all things that like in our power; and then may we stand still,with the utmost assurance, to see the salvation of God, and for his arm to be revealed." (D&C 123: 15,17)


The greatest love and the greatest teachings should be in our homes.