Elder David A. Bednar: Watching with All Perseverance

This is a great talk on parenting and helping our children gain a testimony and then become valiant in that testimony.

Spiritual warnings should lead to increasingly vigilant watching. You and I live in “a day of warning” (D&C 63:58)

Elder Bednar introduces his thoughts on a “spiritual early warning system”:

I pray for the guidance of the Holy Ghost as I describe a spiritual early warning system that can help parents in Zion to be watchful and discerning concerning their children. This early warning system applies to children of all ages and contains three basic components: (1) reading and talking about the Book of Mormon with your children, (2) bearing testimony of gospel truths spontaneously with your children, and (3) inviting children as gospel learners to act and not merely be acted upon. Parents who do these things faithfully will be blessed to recognize early signals of spiritual growth in or challenges with their children and be better prepared to receive inspiration to strengthen and help those children.

Component Number One: Reading and Talking about the Book of Mormon

The Book of Mormon speaks to the spirit and to the heart of the reader like no other volume of scripture.  Regular reading of and talking about the Book of Mormon invite the power to resist temptation and to produce feelings of love within our families.  And discussions about the doctrines and principles in the Book of Mormon provide opportunities for parents to observe their children, to listen to them, to learn from them, and to teach them.

Such conversations can help parents to discern what their children are learning, thinking, and feeling about the truths contained in this sacred volume of scripture, as well as the difficulties they may be facing.

Reading this from Elder Bednar makes me grateful for two things. First, we have tried to follow this counsel as our children have been growing up. Though we didn’t study scriptures every day, there were many times we would have family scripture study together and we have read the Book of Mormon a few times as a family during that scripture study. Second, we have seen the blessings of having our children grow up to be fine people. I believe that has been a direct blessing from reading the scriptures, especially the Book of Mormon, as a family.

Component Number Two: Bearing Testimony Spontaneously

Testimony is personal knowledge, based upon the witness of the Holy Ghost, that certain facts of eternal significance are true.  The knowledge and spiritual conviction we receive from the Holy Ghost are the result of revelation.

Parents should be vigilant and spiritually attentive to spontaneously occurring opportunities to bear testimony to their children. Discussions – especially when parents are as eager to listen intently as they are to talk – can foster a supportive and secure environment in the home and encourage ongoing communication about difficult topics.

I really like that phrase “especially when parents are as eager to listen intently as they are to talk”. As parents we need to listen. It’s hard when we feel like we have so much to share, and that we are right! But we are still learning, and to learn we need to listen.

Component Number Three: Inviting Children to Act

As gospel learners, we should be “doers of the word, and not hearers only” (James 1:22)

Learning requires spiritual, mental, and physical exertion and not just passive reception.

I wish there was a way for my students to catch the visual of that preceding quote. Elder Bednar then expounds on this idea that learners (especially children) need to put forth effort to really learn.

Are you and I helping our children become agents who act and seek learning by study and by faith, or have we trained our children to wait to be taught and acted upon? [Great question?] Are we as parents primarily giving our children the equivalent of spiritual fish to eat, or are we consistently helping them to act, to learn for themselves, and to stand steadfast and immovable? Are we helping our children become anxiously engaged in asking, seeking, and knocking? (See 3 Nephi 14:&) I especially like the idea of “consistently helping”; that is an important principal in parenting.

The spiritual understanding you and I have been blessed to receive, and which has been confirmed as true in our hearts, simply cannot be given to our children. The tuition of diligence and of learning by study and also by faith must be paid to obtain and personally “own” such knowledge. [I like that analogy to tuition – the cost- is diligence, study and faith.] Only in this way can what is known in the mind also be felt in the heart. Only in this way can a child move beyond relying upon the spiritual knowledge and experiences of parents and adults and claim those blessings for himself or herself. Only in this way can our children be prepared spiritually for the challenges of mortality.

Elder Bednar finishes his talk with a promise to parents: The spiritual discernment and inspiration you will receive from the combination of these three holy habits will enable you to stand as watchmen on the tower for your families – “watching . . . with all perseverance” (Ephesians 6:18) – to the blessing of your immediate family and your future posterity.

Great talk!